Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize