all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.