Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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