Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
