She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Randomize
