We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
