My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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