i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
