i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Randomize
