As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Randomize
