do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
