Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
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