I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
