do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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