R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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