Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
where are you?
Hypothermia
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
