I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
