Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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