I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize