Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
