Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
