I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
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