Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys