Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
