dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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