so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize