Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize