My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
