we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Do you have feelings for this penis?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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