Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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