I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize