Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
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and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
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Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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