As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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