Don't you send me to vm
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
50% drunk capacity currently
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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