I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize