Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.