Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
