It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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