dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
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