i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
