Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
