your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize