we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
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