So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize