i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize