..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
