We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
