I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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