the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize