well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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